The cashiers recognize me when I walk in at The Home Depot, Lowes, Target, PetSmart, and Jimmy Johns. PGP.

In some ways, I might be turning into the female version of George Costanza. PGP.

I call our outsourced team in India more than I call my mother. PGP.

Watching a series of heist and crime movies causing you to seriously consider becoming a professional criminal. PGP.

Looking up exercise programs knowing full well that you’ll never do any of them. PGP.

Trading your expensive tobacco habit for an expensive nicotine gum habit. PGP.

“In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique.” PGP.

The daily race home to beat my roommate to the TV after work. PGP.

“Your request to increase your credit line has been denied.” PGP.

Tinder: the only reason I’m on Facebook. PGP.

I already know what my girlfriend is making me do on Valentine’s Day next year. PGP.

Having to buy the same fiber supplement you always saw at your grandparent’s house. PGP.

Updated iPad. Erased everything. PGP.

The best thing that has happened since getting a full-time job: McDonald’s breakfast. The worst thing that has happened since getting a full-time job: McDonald’s breakfast. PGP.

Can’t Snap my deuces to friends because of the office’s automatic thrones. PGP.

Turning up the volume on your headphones ever so slightly when “Turn Down For What” comes on your Spotify. PGP.

I record golf when I’m out of the house on Sunday afternoons. I’ve officially become my father. PGP.

The Engineering Department has a 56-inch flat screen mounted on the wall in full view of everybody on their side. I am not in the Engineering Department. PGP.

I joined a bowling league, mainly to have an excuse to drink on Wednesday nights. PGP.

I have one of the nicer cars in my work lot. I drive a 2012 Camry. PGP.