The old ladies at work tell me I dress like their husbands. PGP

Who needs birth control when you can just listen to your coworkers bitch about their kids all day, everyday.

Finding the acceptable volume for your Pandora to play at your desk without pissing off your co-workers.

Mastering weather-related small talk. PGP.

Threatening to boycott your friends wedding if they don’t have an open bar. PGP

That primal rush when Chipotle doesn’t charge you for double meat.

Having to bring your laptop while on vacation to do work. PGP.

Open enrollment. PGP.

I just spent an entire paycheck paying bills. PGP.

The woman behind me is flossing at her desk.

Only ordering sodas at lunch when it’s on the company dime.

I had to ask someone if I could email them a document because I don’t know how to work a fax machine. PGP.