Already thinking about how you’ll be getting to bed early tonight. PGP.

Do you have any Tums? PGP.

I was the lucky guy selected to go to a career fair this morning to recruit college kids for jobs I wish I could get. PGP.

Being able to relate to Dilbert Cartoons. PGP.

Got excited when I was invited to get drinks with “the girls.” Bailed when I heard we weren’t meeting until 10pm. PGP.

Called in sick and my boss asked if I could come in for a little while. PGP.

The “I don’t drink during the week” prick. PGP.

The “I can’t keep drinking like that during the week” text the next morning. PGP.

I thought about law school until I looked up how much it costs. PGP.

Coworker prints out and highlights driving directions on MapQuest before we go on sales calls. PGP.

Just one year out of playing D1 sports and I already have a dad body for the ages. PGP.

My little brother’s job out of college offered a higher salary than I currently make. PGP.

“Which way did you take to get around that accident?” PGP.

Interns showing you the hot new apps. PGP.

How long have you been working here? PGP.

It’s easier just to lie to people and say I’m still in college. PGP.

Reading PGP on a Friday night because I’ve been asked to come in early on Saturday. PGP.

I want to trash my office on the way out tonight and just ride off into the sunset a hero. PGP.

I jaywalked this morning just to feel alive. PGP.

Your company finally hiring attractive women right after you get a girlfriend. PGP.