I legitimately just questioned if I was invisible. Then questioned my sanity. Then poured another coffee and checked my email. PGP.

Mentally checking out from work two weeks before your day off. PGP.

Let’s have a meeting to plan what we’re going to plan for our next meeting. PGP.

Mint.com and I have much different definitions of the term “Low Balance on Checking.” PGP.

Getting banned from multiple Chipotles for getting caught telling the cashier you got “half and half” when you really got double meat. PGP.

I’m not driving the struggle bus. I’m not even riding the struggle bus. I just got run the fuck over by the struggle bus. PGP.

Making just over the maximum income to be eligible for reduced rent. PGP.

I don’t remember the last time my bank account hit 5 digits. PGP.

If Monday had a face, I would punch it repeatedly. PGP.

90% of the emails I send start with “Sorry for the delay.” PGP.