I can never tell if my boss is joking or actually thinks I don’t do anything here. PGP.

The pressure of bringing a +1 to a company Christmas party is worse than your grandmother telling you how she’ll die before she ever gets grandkids.

Being forced to work with a shorter man who has a raging Napoleon complex. PGP.

“Where are we at on this?” PGP.

Preparing for an interview with another company while attempting to still look productive at your current job. PGP.

Woke up this morning and thought it was Friday. PGP

Not altering my Friday night alcohol consumption even though I’m going in on Saturday. PGP.

Thought I had to poop so I went to the bathroom but it ended just being a big fart. Still stayed in the stall for 10 min. PGP.

Listening to coworkers discuss their kids’ bowel movements. PGP.