It’s basically fermented plant urine that some earthy, crunchy corporations sell to promote and hide behind a healthy lifestyle while also profiting off of a placebo effect while most of their manufacturing facilities are in 3rd world countries that operate under shady employment/environmental laws. Stick to coffee, at least they don’t try to hide the fact that they exploit labor workers for profit and aid in drugging up most of the world’s workforce lol
A good way to get that Uber driver back is to file a rebuttal police report stating that he/she attempted to touch you inappropriately while wearing a weird antler skull mask while dripping hot candle wax all over my front lawn to form the shape of a Pentagram
“Hey, you shut your god damn mouth over there, alright!? We don’t need people asking questions and getting all intelligent and shit. We have a lot invested in this overpriced brown shit liquid because it’s the one drug that makes people productive during the day to earn us a lot of money and then we hit them with the alcohol at the end of the day so they can drown their sorrows and somewhat forget that they work for us forever and there’s no escape…you shush…we wouldn’t want you to have a fatal “accident” “
Did you guys know that according to Tom Brady’s TB12 lifestyle guide, you can’t get sunburns if you drink 2.5 gallons of water a day. But you have to use his water because it has electrolytes in it. Why do you think skin cancer rates amongst pasty Irish people in New England are so low? Did you also know that you don’t need empirical scientific fact in order make a profit in this country lol
You can’t even get a New Era baseball hat for $30 and we all know that girls love dudes who wear backwards New Era hats and have the same 3 tattoo options, with a room temperature IQ because the population and society def isn’t fucked up from poor relationship prospects and reproduction choices at all lol
Pretty soon we’re going to see TV ads where some guy in a turtle neck with glamour soap opera-ish lighting is gonna slowly walk toward the camera in a nice home while being like “Tired of getting nowhere and working so hard for it? Do the overlords have you feeling worried about the future? What if I told you that as a Millennial, you could have the chance to cash out and retire early so you can enjoy the fruits of life? All you have to do is call this number on your screen and we’ll take care of the rest”….”This message has been brought to you by Smith and Wesson”
I wish I didn’t care about girls back then and focused on making as much money as possible because it’s a lot easier to accept fake love when you’re rich. Plus, money buys you a yacht and have you ever seen a sad person on a yacht? The answer to the question is no
“Why can’t you be more like Darryl over there? He’s going pro. You’re not going pro because you couldn’t catch a god damn routine pop fly. You put yourself in a pickle Steven and I don’t mean the baseball kind. Now you’re just gonna live an average existence and probably disintegrate over time in a shitty little cubicle somewhere just like me. I had high hopes for you Steven but now it’s proven that you took your mother’s genes. This fucking sucks. No we aren’t going to McDonald’s after. Shut your mouth”
It’s too much work to stay alive in general. On the bright side, if I die, I won’t have to go to work anymore. Always think positively in the midst of darkness, guys
Even when you are employed, it’s not like you can afford to do the things you actually want to do anyway so who cares. The world is your oyster! Except it’s closed and we’re inside of it. They always left that part out when they used to tell you that when you were young hahaha
Not anymore, foreign investors own most of the top dollar real estate in every major city here and they are staring to seep into the residential real estate sectors so basically this is a rental country with a decent brand slogan
Advertise
It’s basically fermented plant urine that some earthy, crunchy corporations sell to promote and hide behind a healthy lifestyle while also profiting off of a placebo effect while most of their manufacturing facilities are in 3rd world countries that operate under shady employment/environmental laws. Stick to coffee, at least they don’t try to hide the fact that they exploit labor workers for profit and aid in drugging up most of the world’s workforce lol
Cuckleberry Fin
A good way to get that Uber driver back is to file a rebuttal police report stating that he/she attempted to touch you inappropriately while wearing a weird antler skull mask while dripping hot candle wax all over my front lawn to form the shape of a Pentagram
Cool, I just ate 4 day old guacamole
Most def
Because some clown used a bit to hack the voting API in here and Dow voted pretty much everyone on here in oblivion
“Hey, you shut your god damn mouth over there, alright!? We don’t need people asking questions and getting all intelligent and shit. We have a lot invested in this overpriced brown shit liquid because it’s the one drug that makes people productive during the day to earn us a lot of money and then we hit them with the alcohol at the end of the day so they can drown their sorrows and somewhat forget that they work for us forever and there’s no escape…you shush…we wouldn’t want you to have a fatal “accident” “
Will someone please write “Promo Code: SOCK” in the tip section of their bar tab next week?
I’ve been searching far and wide. Still haven’t found it but can confirm that Deep Eddy Lemon Vodka is very good.
Did you guys know that according to Tom Brady’s TB12 lifestyle guide, you can’t get sunburns if you drink 2.5 gallons of water a day. But you have to use his water because it has electrolytes in it. Why do you think skin cancer rates amongst pasty Irish people in New England are so low? Did you also know that you don’t need empirical scientific fact in order make a profit in this country lol
I’m down a few cents right now. They just got a big push of orders so hopefully in the years to come they turn it around
You can’t even get a New Era baseball hat for $30 and we all know that girls love dudes who wear backwards New Era hats and have the same 3 tattoo options, with a room temperature IQ because the population and society def isn’t fucked up from poor relationship prospects and reproduction choices at all lol
Pretty soon we’re going to see TV ads where some guy in a turtle neck with glamour soap opera-ish lighting is gonna slowly walk toward the camera in a nice home while being like “Tired of getting nowhere and working so hard for it? Do the overlords have you feeling worried about the future? What if I told you that as a Millennial, you could have the chance to cash out and retire early so you can enjoy the fruits of life? All you have to do is call this number on your screen and we’ll take care of the rest”….”This message has been brought to you by Smith and Wesson”
But you could make a beautiful mosaic of broken people. Think about the children and stuff
I wish I didn’t care about girls back then and focused on making as much money as possible because it’s a lot easier to accept fake love when you’re rich. Plus, money buys you a yacht and have you ever seen a sad person on a yacht? The answer to the question is no
“Why can’t you be more like Darryl over there? He’s going pro. You’re not going pro because you couldn’t catch a god damn routine pop fly. You put yourself in a pickle Steven and I don’t mean the baseball kind. Now you’re just gonna live an average existence and probably disintegrate over time in a shitty little cubicle somewhere just like me. I had high hopes for you Steven but now it’s proven that you took your mother’s genes. This fucking sucks. No we aren’t going to McDonald’s after. Shut your mouth”
It’s too much work to stay alive in general. On the bright side, if I die, I won’t have to go to work anymore. Always think positively in the midst of darkness, guys
Even when you are employed, it’s not like you can afford to do the things you actually want to do anyway so who cares. The world is your oyster! Except it’s closed and we’re inside of it. They always left that part out when they used to tell you that when you were young hahaha
They meet in the Forest of the High Sierras at Bohemian Grove and celebrate the Cremation of Care
Not anymore, foreign investors own most of the top dollar real estate in every major city here and they are staring to seep into the residential real estate sectors so basically this is a rental country with a decent brand slogan