Madoff

I specialize in damage control, being the drunkest at any and all functions and social assassination. Always appreciate a strong gif game. Follow me on Twitter. Sometimes I put up cool stuff about golfing at the local dirt tracks.

Member Since 09/29/2014

My Metabolism Is Crumbling And So Am I

Relationship Layups That Will Make You Appear To Be A Competent Boyfriend

I’m Breaking Up With Whiskey

There’s A Hidden Danger In Your Margarita And It’s A Total Bummer

I’m Getting Too Old For The Bar

Writers’ Roundtable: Favorite Drunk Food

Thoughts From My First Day Of Law School

The 40-Hour Grind Coupled With Chores Is Leaving Me No Time For Myself

The Death Of Blowjobs

This Hipster Marriage Announcement From The New York Times Is The Most Insufferable Yet