“Who all do we have on the call?” PGP.

My friends got married and engaged this past weekend. I wasted $7 on a claw crane. PGP.

Boss added me on Snapchat. PGP.

*audible sigh* PGP.

Wife ordered me a Romphim. PGP.

Flirting with the HR girl has to be a trap. PGP.

Knowing you’re due for your annual act of mischief and debauchery but still dealing with the fallout from last years incident. PGP.

Coworker just asked me if I ever drink so much that I feel sick the next morning. I’m hungover right now. PGP.

Told I’m one of the top 2 candidates. Didn’t get the job. PGP.

A group of recent college graduates asked me if I’m “also” considered a Millennial. I’m only 25. PGP.