That deep breath you take every time you arrive at the office. PGP.

NSFW only applies when you don’t have your own office. PGPM.

Forgot to wear a belt.

Visiting my parents this weekend because I know they’ll take me to Costco. #PGP.

Praying for the lay off so I get severance, and a break. PGP.

“We should own a bar!” PGP

Calling into a sports talk radio to complain about something. #PGP

I put receiving cock instead of receiving dock in the instruction part of a purchase order

Got asked by a bald coworker if I was thinning up top. He then proceeded to tell me, “Don’t fight it.” PGP.

I spilled Rum and Coke all over myself in public last night. PGP