I’ll never forget the day my college girlfriend and I broke up. Yeah, having your heart ripped out is pretty memorable, but the reason I won’t forget it is because my best buddy was there with a bottle of Evan Williams, a shoulder to lean on, and a ride to the bar to find the blonde that would truly ease the pain.
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I’m not worried about being judged as a corporate yuppie. I’m worried about being judged as homeless because I get my JOE from 7/11 baby.
Surprised the crew did buy all their derby gear from manoutfitters dot com with promo code ‘sock’ for 10% off.
Bumble date, she’s grilling turkey burgers I’m bringing the wine. Boxed of course
thanks but no thanks on the tips Barrett, not trying to dress like a beta male
Beat me to it
The Chase: Devils three way
I don’t understand Josh and Amanda making out 24/7…How do you not just get down to brass tax? Shits weak.
Yeah that tweet isn’t from his lawyer.
I’ve been on a few bumble dates in edge water. $1,000 is roughly the GDP
Hopefully that truck has some peanut butter coming your way.
Driving drunk with blue balls PGP. Cleaning llama shit out of your Tahoe PGP.
6. Masturbating at work
Jesus Defries you must be a real blast at parties….
I’ll never forget the day my college girlfriend and I broke up. Yeah, having your heart ripped out is pretty memorable, but the reason I won’t forget it is because my best buddy was there with a bottle of Evan Williams, a shoulder to lean on, and a ride to the bar to find the blonde that would truly ease the pain.
If I have to look at one more motivational quote under a filtered IG pic of some chick curling 10 lbs I might go postal. FOH with that shit.
Or just hockey jerseys.
You have a point…. but while you silently judge my Elway throwback, I’m too busy stuffing wings into my face/stealing your girl to care.
Squid city. What happened to being a fucking man? These guys seem like they sit down to take a piss.
Peyton threw 4 interceptions with plantar fasciitis and you can’t even walk your dog in them? Pussy.
“Better to be in the moment with friends” *blacks out