High deductible HSA. PGP.

My parents and my dog are the only two things that could possibly love me in the mood I come home in. PGP

Why yes Netflix, I am a 25 year old dude who lives alone “still” watching New Girl on Sunday night. Is that so wrong? It makes me happy.

I’ve never had to actually prove I went to college. PGP.

I would be drinking right now if I was still in school.

Got my friend a job at my office. Now I hate him. PGP.

The sink in the break room is broken, so we’ve been instructed to rinse our dishes in the bathroom prior to placing them in the dishwasher. PGP.

What do I have to do to get fired? I’m out here tryna get a severance. PGP.

When the quality of your weekend hinges on the Coinstar at Safeway being fixed, you start to rethink some of your life choices. PGP.

Christmas Eve is considered a mandatory workday in my office. PGP.