My dad guilt tripped me into flying home for Holidays. The tickets cost $800. Then he asked me what I wanted for Christmas. How about $800? PGP.

My little brother just graduated law school in the top five percent of his class. My dog got kicked out of obedience school. PGP.

25% battery by 2pm. PGP.

I’ve had more PGPs posted this month than I have sales. I’d say my priorities are straight. PGP.

Rewarding yourself for not drinking Monday and Tuesday by getting hammered before 6pm on a Wednesday. PGP.

Mom still thinks I drink too much. PGP.

Month-to-month leases. PGP.

Realizing that everyone has a bachelor’s degree and your time and money spent in college made you average. PGP.

The urge to fiercely urinate woke me up 15 minutes before my alarm. PGP.

I just got a way too excited about downloading the Kroger app. PGP.