Changing girls as often as your underwear. TFM. Changing girls as often as your oil. PGP.

I spent a total of about 53 seconds outside today. PGP.

Having to really think about inviting the girl you’re sleeping with over on a weeknight because you don’t want to be tired at work the next day. PGP.

Awkwardly waiting in line at the water cooler as the office fitness freak fills up her 30 gallon water bottle. PGP.

Not on spring break, but listening to Jimmy Buffet Pandora to let your boss know where your head is at. PGP.

Finished another book of checks #PGP

If this get published it’ll be the most productive thing I do all day. PGP.

My mom has a more active dating life than I do. PGP.