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She didn’t know what to do with herself in the back of their Uber. With Todd sitting in front seat talking to the driver about baseball, they were heading forty-five minutes north of downtown to Caroline’s dad’s house. He resided at a country club, and she explained to Todd that “Ubering there is so much easier than trying to find a parking spot.”
In typical Alex fashion, she sent a group message to each of the girls asking what each one of them was wearing. It was clear Alex was running late (again), as she and Todd were also already running late in the first place.
“Ugh,” she said in the back. “Typical Alex. Late again.”
Todd turned his head back from the front seat. “Where is she?”
“Still getting dressed, I think,” she remarked. “Like, how do you not figure that out in advance?”
Todd shrugged before giving her a compliment. “You look great, babe.”
She smiled, but only until the next sentence came out of his mouth.
“But aren’t you not supposed to wear white to these things unless you’re the bride?”
She looked down at her white blouse and pants in disgust of what Todd had just said. Sure, she thought. You’re not supposed to wear white, but do those rules even apply anymore? Especially in the middle of summer?
“Oh,” she responded. “Just because Caroline is getting married, she all of the sudden has a monopoly on the color white now? Yeah, okay, that makes total sense.”
As they pulled up to Caroline’s dad’s house, they told their driver to simply pull in the driveway and let them out. Neither of them had been to the house before, and Todd gawked at how large it was. As they emerged from the Nissan Sentra, she shout-whispered to him to stop ogling at the house. “It’s hardly bigger than where I grew up,” she said. “Act like you’ve been to a nice house before.”
They could see a large, white tent in the house’s backyard where the party was taking place. As they approached the front door with a gift in tow, they entered without knocking and saw Caroline standing in the entrance room with John’s parents. Each giving somewhat of a shriek, the girls tip-toed towards each other and hugged before Caroline introduced her to John’s parents whom Todd had already met.
John’s mom, Trudy, leaned forward and whispered into her ear – “Look how skinny Caroline’s gotten!”
“Oh, stop it!” Caroline jokingly pleaded, taking it as a compliment rather than a criticism. “I’ve always been this weight.” But the truth of the matter was that Caroline had not eaten a carb since the moment John’s ring touched her finger.
During the exchange, John’s dad nodded his head towards Todd and John to head to the back where the bar was. “Well,” he began, “If we’re gonna be here, might as well take advantage of the bar I’m paying for. You boys like cigars?”
Caroline took the gift she and Todd had brought and put it on a chest near the coatroom. Without saying thank you, she led them to the stone back porch where the untouched buffet was. There was a congregation of men standing by the bar, none of whom had any idea what to do with themselves. Meanwhile, Caroline’s mom put her sunglasses back on and stumbled off to get another dirty martini.
“Sooooo,” she asked Caroline. “Have y’all decided on a wedding hashtag yet?”
Caroline laughed before saying, “Ugh, no, between this and the wedding shower, I’ve barely had time to think about anything.” The fact of the matter was, she had already mentally solidified a hashtag before John had even proposed.
“Well what am I supposed to put in my Instagram caption today if y’all don’t even have a hashtag yet?” she again asked Caroline, half-joking but half-serious.
Caroline laughed to herself until she looked over and saw her mom at the bar. One of John’s fraternity brothers was hitting on her and she knew she’d have to intervene. But just as she began walking across the lawn, she looked over and saw Megan walking into the party.
“Megan!” she shouted. “Over here!”
As Megan approached, she looked at her and said, “Oh my God, can you believe this house?”
“I mean, sure, it’s okay,” she mumbled back. “Anyway, how are you? I think I’m still a little hungover from girls night.”
“Ugh, me too, too much champs for one night.”
As the girls stood and mingled, Todd and Finn approached them while laughing about Caroline’s mom. Finn had been there before Todd had showed up, so when they approached the girls, he gave them both a big hug and expressed how great it was to see them. He smelled like scotch.
A slightly awkward silence fell between the group after the pleasantries were exchanged, only for Finn to pipe up and break it.
“So do you girls know who the Maid of Honor is yet?” .
Confuse and enrage the enemy. I like it, Finn.
Finn Tzu
Finn tossing fire on to the gasoline that is the Maid of Honor situation. Bold move.
The only thing that could be better is the protagonist and Todd’s relationship burning to the ground and #TeamClaire rising like a Phoenix from the ashes
Uh protagonist?
antagonist
Guys, I am sort of terrified that PGP is going to off Will in the fashion of Brian, and we will never find resolution in regards to the heroine.
Why would you out this in people’s heads? The McGannon/Grandex split haunts me to this day.
She’ll end up with Gil
Gil’s last entry was him quitting and riding off into the sunset though.
Why? What makes you think that?
Regarding Will?
Somehow, I’m not too surprised that Caroline’s mom is a MILF.
Is it weird that after reading about Caroline’s mom, the only thing that came to mind was, “Sup?”
I got a mental image of Claire’s mom from Wedding Crashers. “I just had my tits done.”
Wanting to hit on a fictional character. PGP.
The dad knowing exactly what was happening and immediately getting the other men out of there is a bold and stellar move. Props.
Heard your dad knows how to party to
Dads more of the Gatsby type: lays low at the big party that He is hosting, but when you do find Him, you know what’s up.
Caroline’s mom… Would.
Savage move by Finn
Does kind of seem like he’s sauced, so he probably doesn’t realize what he just did.
Let’s be real, even if he was sober Finn wouldn’t think twice about saying something like that.
I can’t decide if engagement parties are awesome or awful. Like, they can be fun but they’re also sort of uppity, no? On another note, can’t wait for Alex and Trip to show up. Low key hope Trip proposes and sends Girl into a crying fury.
I lean towards uppity. But on one had I guess it’s a way to get both sides of the wedding party together to see how they interact. On the other had, fuck you if you expect an engagement gift AND a shower gift.
Well, Protagonist will never be maid of honor now that she upstaged Caroline and wore white to the engagement party.
Whenever TGDAG involves a special event, it makes me wish I was friends with someone really WASPy so I could go to one of these parties.