If You Don’t Buy Floor Tickets, Don’t Bother Going

If You Don’t Buy Floor Seats Don’t Bother Going

As young people in the working world living on our own (most of us), we quickly learn the value of a dollar. We learn how to budget and we learn to cut back in order to survive. You’ve got to cut corners and save a few bucks wherever you can. There are a few areas that are the exception to this: Lunch meat, haircuts, and concert tickets. I refuse to buy lunch meat if it is on sale for $3.99lb because I’d rather shell out a few extra bucks to have the peace of mind that I won’t get sick after my fourth cold cut of the week. I will always pay a bit more for a haircut because I’ve found a barber who is very good at her job and is easy on the eyes. I could save $10-$15 and go to a Supercuts but then it isn’t really an experience. There is no friendly greeting, no glass of scotch, no hot shave, and somehow they will fuck up my very simple haircut. I also will refuse to go to a concert if I can’t get tickets on the floor.

Going to a concert is an experience. You’re there to see a band in the flesh, here the music blaring in your ears and feel the music pulsing through your body. How can you do that when you are stuck in the bleachers 800ft away?

Does that look like fun to you? Those poor souls are undoubtedly going to be watching the concert one of two ways – on a big screen or through binoculars. If you’re paying money for a concert ticket – why would you want to watch it on a damn screen? Save yourself some money and just sit at home and browse Youtube at that point.

“I don’t like being close in close proximity to other people” might be a cop out that someone uses when trying to justify their nosebleed seats. To that point, people watching is a huge part of the concert experience! Have fun sitting behind the dude that is inhaling stadium hot dogs and nachos because I’ll be 20ft away from the band with my new friend Bill who has been following the tour for the past two months. Sure, he has a neck tattoo but his companion Mary Jane is very nice.

“The music is too loud” is another excuse. Why the fuck are you going then? The music should be so loud that I borderline shit myself with every bass kick, my hearing be damned. Throw in some earplugs and suck it up, Sally. This is a concert.

“Floor tickets are more expensive” you say. Yes, they are. But you’re chances at snagging a guitar pick or getting sprayed with the lead singer’s sweat are infinitely higher. You can’t put a price on that.

The only acceptable excuses for not getting floor seats I can come up with are as follows:

1.) Kids.

A good reason not to buy floor tickets, because I swear if you bring them to the floor and put them on your shoulders right in front of me, myself and a handful of others will make your life miserable for being an inconsiderate asshole. I’m sorry you have kids but that’s your problem, it shouldn’t be mine.

2.) A Handicap.

Whether you broke your leg in a car accident or are stuck in a wheelchair for life, this is an unfortunate situation. However I am sure, if you really wanted to, the rest of the pit crew will make some real estate for you because I’d hate for you to miss out on the true concert experience because of something you can’t control.

We make excuses for a lot of things in our lives and find ways to justify them. By doing so, we sell ourselves short and miss out on a lot of opportunities. Within the last year or so, we have had quite a few extremely talented artists leave us, never to play again. Life is short. So next time a show rolls into town that you want to go see, don’t hold back. Grab a ticket on the floor and experience the show as it is intended – up close and personal.

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Mainer born and raised. Boston sports. Miller Lites. Let's get drunk and eat chicken fingers..

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