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HBO has given us all a legitimate, bulletproof excuse for staying home on Friday night: HBO NOW, the network’s premium standalone streaming service is available to you, the nine-to-five working class of America, through Apple or Optimum Online for a mere $14.99 monthly subscription. This changes everything. There’s over 2,000 titles available, and that includes the classics like The Wire, The Sopranos, Sex and the City, and Deadwood, as well as your current favorites like Game of Thrones, True Detective, and Girls.
I know that you may be thinking, “Sounds great, and I celebrate HBO’s entire catalogue, but I’m stretched a little thin in the finance category.” I can respect that. I, too, understand that that struggle is real; However, after crunching the numbers, it turns out that $14.99 per month equates to roughly 68 cents per day. You can swing that. It may require some very, very minor changes in your daily routine, but you can do this. Here are a few recommendations:
Don’t order fries with that burger. Use this as an excuse to stop being a disgustingly unhealthy individual.
Stop blasting cigs. Saving cash and your lungs makes sense, long term.
Bring your old Fender Stratocaster that you learned how to play three chords on in high school downtown. Wear glasses so people know you’re an artist. Drop a hat on the ground for tips and shred some bar chords.
Get a second job for a ride sharing business, but only do one pickup per day, and limit it to a half-mile radius.
Buy regular eggs instead of free-range because they’re just chickens.
Stop buying organic anything because what does that even mean?
Substitute one meal per day with Ramen Noodles. They still taste good, dammit.
Just order water with lunch, because if you have one more soft drink, you might die.
Don’t order that round of shots that nobody wants anyway.
Dig for change in your couch every day.
Seriously, the money you save by not going to the bar and instead staying in to watch Season 4 of The Wire will more than pay for this. You’ve been burned by too many unforeseen, absurd bar tabs, and you know it.
#68CentsADay
Okay, maybe you despise every idea I set forth in this piece. Maybe you’d like to share with the world what you would cut from your budget, or how you would go about obtaining 68 cents per day to afford HBO’s monumental streaming service. Tweet at PostGradProblems and let us know what you would do, and use #68CentsADay. The four best tweets will receive Apple TV with 6 free months of HBO NOW. That’s nuts. An Apple TV for sending out a clever tweet. Take advantage of this, because you need it..
Respond
Dave
Lawyer. Writer. Dude doing business. I'm the meatloaf guy from tv.
@dcarterruff
@dcruff
dcarterruff
david@grandex.co
I… I wouldn’t get guac.
I’m a monster.
The Riyadh snap story raised so many questions about Saudi Arabia for me
The man swimming with lions in the pool…is that a normal thing?
They just whip their cars down roads doing donuts with people lining the road? Some of whom are actually on the road. What even was that.
When do I get notice that I won? I thought it was a pretty good tweet.
So the difference between this and HBOGO (which is free) is…?
Oh yeah, they didn’t pay you to promote HBOGO