Playing phone tag. PGP.

Cold calling by day, blind dating by night. PGP.

Stealing office supplies from a recently laid off coworker’s desk. PGP.

Hating someone you’ve never met because of their condescending tone in emails. PGP.

Dealing with your boss’ secretary who also acts like she is your boss. PGP.

Nobody takes a grown man with a lunchbox seriously. PGP.

Being too tired for sex. PGP.

Not recognizing people on Facebook because their last names change after getting married. PGP.

That one guy brushing his teeth in the bathroom after lunch. PGP.

Trying to fix things at work by blowing into them because you were raised on N64. PGP.

All the best jobs I’m qualified for are in cities where I don’t want to live. PGP.

Getting your mom to endorse you on LinkedIn. PGP.