That one 40-something who asks which bars you’re going to, on any night of the week.

This year I have “Dyson Vacuum” and “Sonicare” on my birthday list.

She sounded way hotter on the phone.

That one annoying person you couldn’t stand in college is now a part of your “crew”. PGP.

Never setting up a name for your wifi network. PGP.

I can’t believe I wasted my night here. I could have done laundry. #PGP

The highlight of my day was getting a good parking spot. PGP.

Getting annoyed at your coworkers because they ask you to do your job. #PGP

I feel like by the time I can actually afford nice stuff, I’ll be too old to enjoy it PGP.

Working for the weekend…More like working for the one night I can go out before the two day hangover ensues. PGP.

Getting an email from your boss that contains 4 sentences and 16 exclamation points.

I’ll endorse you, if you endorse me. #PGP