Awkward head nods. PGP.

I don’t remember anything from college. PGP.

The walk of shame back to my office after being in the bathroom for a good 30 minutes or so. PGP.

NyQuil: because Ambien is too expensive. PGP.

Always taking your contacts out. PGP.

Thinking “I can still get 6 hours if I fall asleep now… 5 hours… 4 hours… Fuck.” PGP.

The office 6 becoming the office 8 due to lack of competition. PGP.

Constantly reassuring yourself how young you still are. PGP.

“This doesn’t leave the room…” conversations. PGP.

Staying late until traffic dies down. PGP.

“So, what time did you roll in this morning?” PGP.

“Seeking Motivated Individuals.” PGP.

On the phone with IT. PGP.

When your G Chat buddies go to lunch. PGP.

“I just want to make sure we’re on the same page here.” PGP.

Touching base. PGP.

Elevator rides with your boss. PGP.

I’m seriously considering signing up for one of those Dave Ramsey “Financial Peace University” classes. PGP.

“How in the Hell is everybody able to afford all of these trips?” PGP.

You’re just an alcoholic now. PGP.