StayGolden

Member Since 07/27/2016

  • StayGolden 6 years ago on I’m Not Going To Have Sex With You Just Because You Bought Me A Drink, Okay?

    Satire-aside, had a college buddy who truly thought this way about ladies at the bar. My incessant bantering about how a $10 drink didn’t solidify a hook-up failed to foster any new found enlightenment on the issue. What finally opened his eyes was him punching a brick wall and breaking his hand one night after spending $50 on a girl and then not hooking up (not a deal closer). He couldn’t lift upper body for 8 weeks following and was truly heart-broken. Him and I are no longer friends.

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  • StayGolden 6 years ago on Is It Ever Okay To Not Go Home For The Holidays?

    My parents are leaving me in MN to visit my brother in NC this year. I can’t take work off (new job), so I’m taking a weekend solo trip to Chicago. Spending Xmas alone, eating a large deep dish and keeping my eyes out for the Wet Bandits.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Ranking The Best Days To Break Up With Someone

    Wow. I always break up with gals on Sundays. For some reason, the scaries hit and I immediately think, “I can not stand another full week being with this person.” So I end it. What else do I have left to do on a Sunday night? Then I have work, responsibilities, and planning for the next weekend to keep my mind off the person for at least 4-5 days. Seems to work.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Never Check To See What Time It Is During The Middle Of The Night

    My alarm’s set for either 4am to workout (have a commute to the gym, gives me time to “wake up”, etc.) or 6am to get up for work. Sometimes I wake up earlier than 4 (usually to take a piss), so I just get up then. If I crawl back into bed, I’m sleeping til 6 and not working out til after work, which sort of sucks.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Never Check To See What Time It Is During The Middle Of The Night

    As someone who enjoys an early morning workout if I’m awake and feeling up to it, I love when I wake up sans alarm around 330-430am. Happens about 2x a week and I’ll just go to bed earlier the next night to accommodate the missed sleep from the early wake up. Sometimes it’s great when your body does it. A little extra time to eat a good breakfast, a little extra time at the kitchen counter sipping your coffee scrolling through Insta models or reading the WSJ. If you wake up only a half hour away from your alarm going off, just get out of bed.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Bring On Fall

    That brisk chill in the air, the sound of crushing helmets on a field, the smell of pumpkin spice wafting out of the nearest Starbucks, the glow of a campfire in the backyard… Fall needs to get here.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Life Is Better With A Patio

    Patios to apartments are what front porches are to houses. A perfect place to crack open a cold one and kick back, whether it be solo, with some buddies, or with the latest lady friend in your life.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Being Petty Isn’t The Best Way To Go Through Life But It’s A Lot Of Fun

    “I’m not going to get over that by being a mature adult about it. I’m going to get over it by saying disparaging remarks about her to my friends. I’m going to get over it by leaving drunk voicemails and subtweeting. It’s 2017 and no one is mature anymore. That’s just the way of the world right now.”

    Thanks for planning my weekend, Duda!

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on The Brunette Across The Room, Part Four

    “It was officially over, and it had all started that night about a year ago when he had haphazardly thrown a beer on some guy whom he couldn’t pick out of a lineup now.”

    Ain’t this the truth 95% of the time? Where it’s almost always that one dude you met only a few times who might have been just a little too friendly? This near non-existent person who sends you into a downward spiral of thinking and drinking.

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Mom, Please Stop With The Voicemails

    The Rents aren’t too horrible in regards to VMs, but at work, it’s utterly obnoxious.
    “Type in your pin”
    “Press 1 to hear message…”
    “…Press 7 to delete message”
    I’ve had multiple conversations with co-workers stating, “Please for the love of God, if I don’t answer my phone, just shoot me an e-mail.”

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  • StayGolden 7 years ago on Double Monitor Life: A Love Story

    Triple monitor is the way to go. I work in a law office, so the legal PDFs look glorious in full vertical form. Scanning a trial brief has never been easier.

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