My life goal is to be so successful that it hurts my ex girlfriends feelings. PGP

I’ve never been asked for proof that I graduated. PGP.

Patiently waiting for all the baby boomers to retire so we all can just work from home everyday. PGP.

Found out my old middle school bully works at Starbucks. I go there twice a week in a suit. PGP

Just gave my two weeks during my annual performance review. DOBBY IS A FREE ELF. PGP.

Netflix autopay just overdrafted my checking account. PGP.

All my friends are assholes, but I have no idea where you find new ones. PGP.

Getting yelled at by your boss because you have been making the intern water the fake plants for the last three months. PGP.

Submitting one resume and immediately planning a life based around that potential job. PGP.

Needing 2-3 years experience for every entry level job, which makes absolutely no sense. PGP.