FOUND OUT LAST NIGHT I OWE THE IRS $4700 OF RENT TO LIVE IN THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH. GOOD THING WE ARE CAPITALISTS BECAUSE I’LL BE CAPITALIZING ALL DAY. I’M CURRENTLY MAKING BULLETPROOF TEA TO MAKE MY ASCENT TO BECOMING THE GOD OF CLOSING. TIME TO BREAK NECKS AND CASH CHECKS, BOYS
Houston DBC:
1. Kung Fu
2. Concrete Cowboy
3. Drive drunk to Dogwood in Midtown, because thats what a douchebag would do
4. Shot Bar
5. Gaslamp
6. Was Red Door, but RIP
Advertise
Well you’re technically closer to 30 already then. Sorry to break it to you
If you’re in River Oaks, I’ll take you up on that. It’s like MILFadelphia over there
“Who’s hungry? Who’s hungry?”
Please now explain how that pussy Ted Mosby goes to the same bar every night and happens to bang close to 100 of NY’s finest on an architect’s salary.
Taking your birthday on Monday off to have a 3-day birthday weekend. PGPM.
Realizing you’ll spend said birthday hungover in bed. PGP.
Cocaine’s for closers
I’ve started calling my friends pussy pot pie lately and it’s been working pretty well
No. PGP
Primerica? Probably Primerica.
I don’t just disagree, I also do not respect your opinion.
FOUND OUT LAST NIGHT I OWE THE IRS $4700 OF RENT TO LIVE IN THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH. GOOD THING WE ARE CAPITALISTS BECAUSE I’LL BE CAPITALIZING ALL DAY. I’M CURRENTLY MAKING BULLETPROOF TEA TO MAKE MY ASCENT TO BECOMING THE GOD OF CLOSING. TIME TO BREAK NECKS AND CASH CHECKS, BOYS
Her name isn’t just Cartographer
The man is a modern day Jesus
“I wish I had three hands so I can give those titties 3 thumbs DOWNNN”
RIP Rick James as well
This article made me feel less bad about spending 1/3 of my pay on vices and eating out
“Positivity only. Build the energy. Come correct or don’t come at all..”
Houston DBC:
1. Kung Fu
2. Concrete Cowboy
3. Drive drunk to Dogwood in Midtown, because thats what a douchebag would do
4. Shot Bar
5. Gaslamp
6. Was Red Door, but RIP
For being an analyst, you didn’t analyze that acronym much
Am I the only one that would feel bad about being an accomplice to adultery? I kissed a girl that I later found out had a boyfriend and felt terrible
Who am I kidding, I’m asking for myself