Someone is VERY single and not happy about it. That being said: I disagree. I took the advice of my friends who are dating/married (the same advice your complaining about) and am currently in the best relationship of my life. So, there is truth to be told in the advice. You just don’t like hearing it because it calls for patience.
I dated a girl at one point who was a biter. But not like “kinky biter,” we’re talking “gator chomp on your fucking lip and tongue.” She bit my tongue and wouldn’t let go to the point that I had to actually pull it out via leaning back which caused a popping sound to come from my tongue along with some severe pain. This led them to an awkward conversation and eventually me dropping her like a bad habitat after two weeks of makeouts and her creeping through my window instead of knocking on my front door like a normal person.
A guy running around in a Santa outfit firing off a pistol is exactly how I want my birthday to be celebrated. Also, what’s with the amount of recoil there, Dale? Hold a musket like a man!
Surprised to not see PBR on here. Also, glad to see Michelob Ultra is on there, objectively confirming my suspicion that is was a shit beer for douches all along.
Advertise
Yea, didn’t read the first line…. it was intended to be irony because of how the rest of it read.
I got an ad for a Russian bride. If anyone wants the link, DM me.
Someone is VERY single and not happy about it. That being said: I disagree. I took the advice of my friends who are dating/married (the same advice your complaining about) and am currently in the best relationship of my life. So, there is truth to be told in the advice. You just don’t like hearing it because it calls for patience.
EL CUNADO
Chode juggler was another good one
http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/
I dated a girl at one point who was a biter. But not like “kinky biter,” we’re talking “gator chomp on your fucking lip and tongue.” She bit my tongue and wouldn’t let go to the point that I had to actually pull it out via leaning back which caused a popping sound to come from my tongue along with some severe pain. This led them to an awkward conversation and eventually me dropping her like a bad habitat after two weeks of makeouts and her creeping through my window instead of knocking on my front door like a normal person.
Capitals are going to win the Cup.
Glad that the Blue Jackets weren’t mentioned on here. I have had enough dismay over that as it is.
Yea, he lost all his connections though
My girlfriend has a bell that she rings. It’s kinda fun.
That’s a way to start a Friday
I tried putting “Died for sins” on the philanthropy portion of my 1040… got rejected. Fucking commies.
Fuck, we’re losing Jurassic Park. Got binge watch that shit. Then, I’m prepping myself for “All Hail King Julien.”
You have my blessing.
NEVER REVEAL THE LUNCH SPOT!
Always go for the musk scent. Anything else and you’re not a man.
Real Thing: me and Peter. Bridge: me and John. Awkward: me and Judas.
A guy running around in a Santa outfit firing off a pistol is exactly how I want my birthday to be celebrated. Also, what’s with the amount of recoil there, Dale? Hold a musket like a man!
Surprised to not see PBR on here. Also, glad to see Michelob Ultra is on there, objectively confirming my suspicion that is was a shit beer for douches all along.