Sometimes I feel unprofessional for being a freelancer who works from home..But then I just roll over and take a 2:00 pm nap.

Just uttering “Mornin'” to a coworker because you’re apparently too lazy to say “Good morning.” PGP.

All of my phone calls with coworkers last about 20 seconds, and someone always ends up saying “Just email me that information.”

“Reaching out” to people instead of just emailing or calling them. PGP

Frantically pressing the close door button in the elevator at the sound of approaching footsteps. PGP.

People are beginning to expect more out of me. PGP

My boss just rejected my expense report for $7.00. PGP

I know far more about the history and corporate structure of Sterling Cooper than the company I actually work for. PGP

Tinder is responsible for my gf of 2 years

Lying about having seen a YouTube video so you don’t have to stand there and watch it.