Just found out that my base salary is lower than company standards for my job. PGP.

I don’t always take a shit at work, but when I do, I take at least half an hour. PGP.

Picked the wrong Sperry’s for casual Friday.. Everybody in the office can smell the Natty Light stains on them

My cubicle is basically just a cesspool of my own farts.

Someone flushed a toilet during a conference call.

Your married Facebook friends posting sappy romantic shit on each other’s Walls. PGP.

I now have preset AM radio stations

I took today off of work to relax and catch up on sleep. I forgot to turn my alarm off

That moment when you realize your parents were right. About everything. PGP.

I reached the point of not giving a shit and told a past due customer I didn’t want to hear his shit and to just pay his bills. PGP