Bagels? If im in Chicago, The Windy City, you bet in getting a deep dished pizza! Its like if im in Philadelphia, The City of Brotherly Love, im getting a nice greasy cheesesteak!
I quit coffee several months ago. My secret? Masterbation. Yankin the crank wakes you up and puts you in a great mood. Tired at work? Go the the bathroom and choke the chicken. Hungover after a night of boozin? Spank the ole monkey and youll feel good as new. Big deadline coming up? Rub the one eyed snake during coffee break and youll feel ready to take on the world.
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Going to Weird Al concert
Gonna crush some delis today
Caturday is for the Cats
Here we go again
Eggs and bakey with some biscuits flakey
Eggs and bakey, biscuits flakey!!!
Preach
More like Daniel Pout – er
For the low price of an arm and a leg
I can get 1,750 chicken nuggets at McDonalds for $350!!!
Poor Justin. He must be so jealous of Rick
Under Trump’s tax plan, i still cannot afford Man Outfitters PGP
Looks like weve got a real Sigmon Froyd over here
Brunch is nice but im more of a breakfast guy. Ill always say “Ill have the eggs benny, hold the benny”
Bagels? If im in Chicago, The Windy City, you bet in getting a deep dished pizza! Its like if im in Philadelphia, The City of Brotherly Love, im getting a nice greasy cheesesteak!
I’ll do all the last-minute DITHERING I want!! Don’t tell me how to live my life, Hillary!!!
Would
“How was your weekend?”
“Not bad. Went to Mexico and fucked a guy twice my age. How was yours?”
I quit coffee several months ago. My secret? Masterbation. Yankin the crank wakes you up and puts you in a great mood. Tired at work? Go the the bathroom and choke the chicken. Hungover after a night of boozin? Spank the ole monkey and youll feel good as new. Big deadline coming up? Rub the one eyed snake during coffee break and youll feel ready to take on the world.
RIP