The guy in the cubicle next to mine spent an hour talking to someone about his cats today. PGP.

I can’t even afford a fixer-upper. PGP.

My Google Chrome Top 8 homepage acting as my morning to-do list. PGP.

According to my calculations, it will at least two years until I can afford 2-ply toilet paper. PGP.

If Sallie Mae was a real person, I’d hunt her down and punch her in the fucking face. PGP.

All work and no play makes Jack a journalist. PGP.

My boss is letting everyone hang out in the conference room and watch the World Cup. I hate soccer. PGP.

Spelling your email phonetically. PGP.

My coffee intake has doubled since graduating. Not because my job is harder than school, just more boring. PGP.

Actually being the stalled vehicle on the side of the road you always hear on rush hour traffic reports. PGP.