Not needing an alarm clock. PGP.

My parents still have to co-sign on my apartment lease. PGP.

I listened to “Dust in the Wind” twice in a row on my way to work this morning. PGP.

Hearing songs from your childhood on a classic rock station. PGP.

My inbox is full, but my life is empty. PGP.

Knowing you’re being catfished on Tinder and still playing along with it. PGP.

Watching “Elf” over MNF because that’s what the wife wants. PGP.

“I just got a call that my apartment is flooded” -Everyone in my office who just left early. PGP.

One of these days, I’m going to scream “Shut the fuck up” out loud instead of in my head. PGP.

Seeing something NSFW online and immediately going to your phone to look at it. PGP.