Getting more matches on bumblebizz than I ever got on bumble. PGP.

Transferring credit card balances to avoid the interest. PGP.

Getting irritated by a coworker’s loud and angry keyboard-typing noises. PGP.

“You are the first caller to the conference.” PGP.

Justifying spending more by telling yourself you’ll get more reward points. PGP.

Being the only one to laugh during a 7-person conference call when someone said, “We need to somehow add girth.” PGP.

Finally got to use, “just putting out some fires” when asked how my job is going. PGP.

Boss: “No need to rush on the project..”First of all, we both know that’s bullshit. PGP.

I was so proud of myself for remembering to pack a lunch last night. I left it in the fridge this morning. PGP.

“Please let do not hesitate to reach out if you have any questions.” directly translates to “This conversation is over and I hope to never hear from you again.” PGP.