Today, I received a stern talking-to. PGP.

My parents still ask about my high school girlfriend who is married. PGP.

They forgot to up-charge me for guac today. I feel like I just won the lottery. PGP.

The only thing I noticed about the first day of Fall is that it’s Monday. PGP.

Wondering what would happen if I just “forgot” to come back to work after lunch. PGP.

My friends are all getting engaged. I’m still puking on street corners. PGP.

Spent the past two days fixing the summer interns’ mistakes. PGP.

The only productive thing I’ve done today is download iOS 8. PGP.

I am not a team player. PGP.