“Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” PGP

Seriously neglecting routine auto maintenance.

All your best tweets going to your drafts to die cuz you’re paranoid the offensive content will get you fired

I’m even on a dry-streak for Tinder matches. #PGP

That one coworker that can’t walk by your desk without saying something. PGP

Getting your password wrong four times because you have the shakes from the weekend.

The subtle “I wouldn’t go in there” look to a coworker as you’re walking out of the bathroom. PGP.

The guy two cubes over that answers his phone with “Domino’s Pizza”, and laughs hysterically like it’s the first time he said it.

I go to the office gym twice a day…because my secret poop place is in the men’s locker room. PGP.

Awkwardly removing valuables from your car while they guy waits to starts detailing it. PGP.