“The Bachelorette” Fantasy Suite Date Bingo, By A Dude

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Alright, folks. After ABC subjected us to the Bachelorette version of the Red Wedding with Hometown Dates and Dean’s gut-wrenching departure, hopefully this week’s Fantasy Suite Dates will bring us something more, I don’t know, not totally fucking miserable to watch. To give us a little bit of extra distraction, let’s keep the bingo train going so we have something to cheer for besides hopefully Eric going home this week.

In case you haven’t played before, here’s how this little game works. This will take you to your bingo board. Every time you click the link, you’ll get a randomly generated card. Make one, make two, make so many that your browser crashes. Just go nuts. Every square will be covered by an event that is likely to transpire during this week’s Fantasy Suite episode. I’ll be live tweeting from @CrickWatsonMD using #BacheloretteBingo, so make sure to follow and cross off your squares as they happen on the episode – I mean I think you’ve all progressed past third grade, so I don’t think I need to give super detailed instructions on how bingo works. Just make sure to keep your glasses full and take a big old drink every time one of your squares gets crossed off – or anytime really. Let’s get Monday lit.

When you get five in a row, column, or diagonal, yell BINGO, finish your drink, tell everyone that you’re playing with that they’re shit, and most importantly, tweet a picture of that game winning board to me so I can prominently feature your success for the Internet to see.

Here’s what we’ll be playing with this week:

– Rachel cries
– Dude cries
– Sex noises
– “Do Not Disturb” sign
– “Most amazing night ever”
– Rachel doesn’t sleep with a dudes
– Rose petals on the bed
– “I’m trying to find a husband”
– Hot tub
– Pop champagne
– “Take things to the next level”
– Sex hair
– “I’m in love with Rachel”
– Rachel tells a dude she’s falling for him
– Dean gets mentioned
– Breakfast in bed
– “Hardest decision yet”
– “Intimate”
– “We didn’t sleep at all”
– “I would marry Rachel!”
– “I’ve never felt this way before”
– “Big step”
– Reference to a dude’s junk
– Heart to heart with Chris Harrison
– “I don’t want you to feel any pressure”
– Bryan gets a rose
– Peter gets a rose
– Eric gets a rose

And of course,

– “Right reasons”.

Image via ABC / YouTube

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Crick Watson MD

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

• @CrickWatsonMD