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As summer comes to a close, so too does wedding season. As such, I spent this weekend at my final wedding of this particular year. Or to be more accurate, I spent Friday night at the final wedding of the season and I spent Saturday and Sunday recovering. But while my thighs are still protesting exactly how low I dropped it, at least I had a better weekend than these people.
This Lady
We’ve all had a few drinks and “lost” the people we are with, right? But one husband in Rhode Island took that a step further this weekend.
According to the Providence Journal, local police called the Coast Guard around 2:00 a.m. Saturday morning when a man ran his 39-foot sailboat aground in Narragansett Bay after a few adult beverages and then subsequently discovered his wife was not on board. The catch? She had apparently fallen off the boat the afternoon before and he hadn’t noticed.
Petty Officer Sam Van Lent told the paper that the “man told investigators that he thought she was below deck during the couple’s daylong sail and that he had struck the Pell Bridge sometime in the afternoon. The husband told officers that the last time he had seen his wife was in the early afternoon.”
The Coast Guard launched a water search while police went to the couple’s home to see if the woman had returned there; the woman was found when “a good Samaritan contacted the Coast Guard at about 4 a.m. to report hearing a woman calling for help at Potter’s Cove on Prudence Island.”
The woman was suffering from mild hypothermia when she was found and refused treatment on the scene, although frankly, I’m more worried for her husband when he gets home. [via Providence Journal]
Wiz Khalifa
Another week, another break-in. But luckily for this week’s victim, someone was home to scare off the would-be thieves.
Early Saturday morning, Wiz Khalifa’s CA home was broken into, but unlike in recent cases, the burglars were greeted by someone in the home – Khalifa’s housesitter, who scared off the two men in hoodies who had broken some glass to gain entrance to the home around 4:45 a.m.
According to TMZ, no property was taken and the only damage to the property was the broken glass. Who thought that out of the all of the recent celebs to be robbed, Wiz Khalifa would be the one smart enough to have a housesitter? [via TMZ]
James Vick
James Vick has been demanding a high-profile MMA fight and after a four-win streak, he got one at UFC Fight Night in Lincoln, Nebraska, on Saturday night. Unfortunately for him, it didn’t turn out as planned.
After losing two fights in a row, UFC lightweight Justin Gaethje knocked out Vick one minute and twenty-seven seconds into opening round.
Justin Gaethje with a potential knockout of the year contender as he puts James Vick to sleep #UFCLinclon pic.twitter.com/7Zh2Z1uaCn
— Ride The Pine Sports (@RideThePine_) August 26, 2018
At least Vick was classy in defeat:
[via ESPN]
Nick Young
Apparently being an NBA champion isn’t garnering Nick Young any favors with Hollywood police.
The former Warriors guard was pulled over for a routine traffic violation on Friday night, but it went from “routine” to “arrest” when Iggy Azalea’s former better-half refused to cooperate with officers. The free agent was then arrested for obstruction of justice and taken to a nearby police station.
Young was pulled over for a routine traffic violation, according to TMZ Sports, but then things took a turn. The 33-year-old reportedly refused to cooperate with officers and was arrested for obstruction of justice.
Wonder how swaggy Swaggy P was in a jail cell? [via NBCSports]
Floridians
Snakes scare of the crap out of me, which now apparently means I can’t go to Florida.
Researchers have found what they are calling a new dangerous “super snake” while examining the tail tissue of 400 pythons captured in the Everglades. The subspecies is believed to be a crossbreed between Burmese and Indian pythons.
Margaret Hunter, lead author of the study, which appeared in the journal Ecology and Evolution, told the Miami Herald that the discovery of the new breed was a surprise,
We were initially looking for the population structure to get some information to shed some light on the invasion dynamics, or the core areas where the population may be breeding and then sending off migrants.
Yeah, I don’t really care about any of that. I just don’t want any snakes anywhere near me. [via New York Post] .
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
It’s just one big snake orgy down in the Everglades.
Really thought the Florida piece was going to be about those shot in Jacksonville, but I guess snakes suck too.
If me and my boyfriend progress over the years, I will absolutely be the woman falling off the boat with my husband not noticing.
All things considered, not that bad a weekend for Wiz.