Saw the sun for the first time today on my commute home. PGP.

Forgetting to turn the volume down while watching the Spring Break story on Snapchat while at work. PGP.

The song “I don’t fuck with you” accurately describes how I feel about my coworkers. PGP.

When someone walks up to your desk and starts up a conversation while you’re clearly wearing headphones. PGP.

There’s a Spring Break story on SnapChat. PGP.

Inspirational quotes in email signatures. PGP.

“Please let me know if you have anymore questions!” PGP.

Applying for positions you’re clearly under qualified for in hopes that they throw you an entry level position just to be nice. PGP.

My boss told me to take it easy this weekend. PGP.

Already thinking about how you’ll be getting to bed early tonight. PGP.

Do you have any Tums? PGP.

I was the lucky guy selected to go to a career fair this morning to recruit college kids for jobs I wish I could get. PGP.

Knowing your boss is coming around the corner just by the sound of the footsteps. PGP.

Owing the federal government money instead of them owing you money. PGP.

Called in sick and my boss asked if I could come in for a little while. PGP.

Being able to relate to Dilbert Cartoons. PGP.

Got excited when I was invited to get drinks with “the girls.” Bailed when I heard we weren’t meeting until 10pm. PGP.

The “I don’t drink during the week” prick. PGP.

Been calling a new guy Steve for two weeks. He emailed me today that his name is Rick. PGP.

The “I can’t keep drinking like that during the week” text the next morning. PGP.