If I’m not going to be home by 10, I’m not going to do it. PGP.

Couldn’t get an Adderall prescription so I bought off-brand caffeine pills instead. PGP.

Researching a company on LinkedIn and being distracted by profiles of the hot girls in their marketing department. PGP.

I can recognize cars I’ve seen before by their license plates on my commute. PGP.

Promoted to a bigger office. Computer screen now faces the door. PGP.

I used to be cool… PGP.

Coming off ‘too confident’ in interviews is suddenly a bad thing. PGP.

Too old to sit in the student section, too rowdy to be tolerated in the regular seats. PGP.

Just got a promotion and a raise. I now make less per hour. PGP.

The Saved By The Bell cast currently looks younger than I do. PGP.

I’ve been here for two months. I came to the horrifying realization today that no one here knows what the hell they’re doing. PGP.

Guess I should have done a three year internship to meet entry level job requirements. PGP.

The first 10 minutes of today’s conference call was about the weather. PGP.

Caught myself watching the local news and actually enjoying it. PGP.

Signing a card for someone in the office who you didn’t even know existed. PGP.

Low balance alerts. PGP.

Younger me envisioned adulthood involving a lot more money and a lot more sex. PGP.

The new guy sits next to me so now I’m expected to be his best friend. PGP.

Got my new dress slacks delivered to the office. PGP.

Kentucky (-18) to make rent. PGP.