How’s your typical Wednesday night looking these days? I bet I can guess: You roll in after sitting in God-awful traffic for 35 minutes while listening to AM sports radio, then you turn your attention to dinner. You were going…Read More »
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That Time You Almost Turned Into Your Dad
It’s the weekend, and it’s daytime. A few years ago you’d be taking this time to drink, or at least plan your drinking for the night. But that seems like a long time ago. You’re tired. Hey, you put in…Read More »
In Defense Of The “Non-Relationship”
Despite criticisms from people who just don’t understand, such as parents, the non-relationship is here to stay. This isn’t our parents’ America, that’s for sure. Our values have changed, our priorities have changed, and the marriage statistics reflect that. For…Read More »
How To Quit Your Job
Our parents and grandparents had the belief that once you have grown up and are done with your studies, you take a job and you work there until your retirement. The value of loyalty was far beyond chasing salaries to…Read More »
Make Your Drunk, Grandiose Idea Of Owning A Bar A Reality, Maybe
When my friends have get-togethers, we always reminisce about the good ol’ days: tailgates, drunken moments, that ugly girl Steve hooked up with that now has kids, etc. Without fail, the one topic that always gets brought up is one…Read More »
14 Ways To Ensure You Get A Terrible Uber Rating (As A Passenger)
1. Sneak a beer in, shotgun that beer mid-ride and spike your empty out the window. 2. Take like thirty selfies with your driver while he or she is driving. Don’t ask permission, and make sure the flash is on.…Read More »
Wedding Season Means It’s Time For Your Friends To Dress You Like A Dog
‘Tis the season, wedding season. What little disposable income you have will go toward buying flights, hotels, rental cars, and renting shitty used clothes from Men’s Wearhouse. If you’re lucky, you actually like the jackass who’s getting married, because that’s…Read More »
The Dictionary For Corporate Douches
In case you haven’t noticed during every second of every day while confined in the cubes of corporate hell, business people are obsessed with sounding more intelligent than they actually are. That’s the whole “art” of business really: convincing a…Read More »
Brooklyn Hipsters Found First Preschool For Adults
The main reason I drink at family holiday gatherings is the inevitable political discussion that ensues after dessert, usually initiated by none other than my own mother. I am sure most readers can relate. After the political discussion dies down…Read More »
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