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Having a cool job and working for a cool company are two of the more important aspects considered by our generation when looking for places to work. Everything from local business journals to Outside Magazine publish lists related to “best places to work” on an annual basis. The companies that perform well in these lists all have the same sort of perks like relaxed office culture, paid time off, and a sterling reputation for community participation.
Some of these places can use their reputations to their advantage. Companies like Vail Resorts and Nike are able to pay their employees substantially lower salaries, because of the external perks you are afforded. On the other hand, a company like Bing has to pay its representatives more than Google, because fuck Bing.
But there’s a drawback to the strategy of only looking at places with perks or in fun industries. According to the Wall Street Journal, if you work in a suspect industry, you’re hurting your chances at moving up the corporate ladder.
Offbeat businesses often attract ambitious people eager to make their mark in a burgeoning field. But a senior manager’s stint at a pot grower, vendor of intimacy aids [Ed Note: they’re talking about dildos and fleshlights here] or personal matchmaking service could become a résumé black mark unless the role delivers highly valued expertise, executive recruiters and leadership coaches say.
Well that’s disheartening. One would hope companies that specialize in mind-altering substances and helping people fuck themselves would be able to attract top talent.
Moreover, at an executive level, who gives a shit what industry someone works in. Did your company grow? Were stakeholders rewarded? Then great! And let’s take a look at the difficulties some of these companies could face. Let’s say you’re the CFO of a pot company, can you imagine the logical gymnastics that have to take place on the 1120 of a company that is still illegal under federal law? Or how about the advertising and marketing department of a company that makes a product that is specifically made to stimulate both the vagina and butthole at the same time? You can’t just write that on a billboard, no matter how funny it would be.
Or let’s take a look at, oh I don’t know, Grandex. You think Madison or Dave are worried that their future prospects are going to be impacted by the fact that they peddle work-appropriate smut? Probably not. They do a great job making money and fostering a fun community, and part of those aspects happen to be Instagram Babe of the Day and the fact that I once wrote child soldier fan fic here.
So get fucked, corporate America. Maybe you should take advantage of some of the products that these blacklisted companies are providing. Maybe then you would be a little more fun. .
[via Wall Street Journal]