20 Ways Life After College Didn’t Change Much

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While I was in school, I daydreamed of the future – of days filled with my own apartment, my gorgeous boyfriend and my dream job. None of that has happened yet. In fact, a lot of things are remarkably similar to how they were three years ago. Funny how life didn’t change overnight – the night I got my diploma, of course.

1. I have my own apartment, but like the one in college, there is no furniture. I have a dining room table, a king size bed and a record player. I’ve lived here for four months. At least my bed got bigger?
2. I spend free time at work taking selfies, because if I’m having a good hair day, the world should know.
3. Like I once did during my internship days, I daydream of working a job where I use my degree occasionally.
4. I still drink four nights a week. Now it’s just by myself more often. I guess it was actually like that in college, too. Never mind.
5. I’m still waiting for the guys I date to grow up. At least they’ll happily pay for things now.
6. Am I ever going to get a paycheck that supports the lifestyle I think I should have? There is no way to find a smart, successful, 6’2″ tall, dark and handsome if I can’t hang out where he does.
7. I skim work assignments just like I did reading assignments. Poets of the 15th century weren’t always interesting and sometimes neither is work.
8. I look for any and all office errands that I can use as an excuse to leave. The entire office needs Starbucks? I’ll get it! It’s Friday so we need donuts? I know a great place. Just let me leave, please.
9. I do love my job, but like I did at my internships, I’m constantly wondering if it’s actually a path that’s going to lead somewhere I’d like my life to go.
10. I wonder when people at work will start respecting me as someone who occasionally knows what they’re doing. I look 12 and I get that I don’t have much experience yet, and am actually not deserving of earned respect. I just wonder when that day will be.
11. My parents still pay for my car insurance and cell phone. If they haven’t brought it up yet, why would I?
12. I still spend way too much money on spur of the moment road trips that I can’t afford. Where do you think my cell phone savings go? That’s gas money. It’s the drinking money I can’t afford. At least now I don’t decide to drive home at 5 a.m. because I couldn’t afford a hotel room.
13. Hot pockets, black beans and rice and tacos are perfectly acceptable meals. I still daydream of someday looking like Keira Knightley while said items continue to be staples in my diet.
14. Cooking for one is still not worth the time. Chipotle it is.
15. I’m still dating an imaginary boyfriend.
16. Having quarters for the laundry facility at my apartment complex seems like a waste of $10, so I take my laundry home, and conveniently find plans with high school friends while I’m there so my mom will fold it while I’m out. At least I put it in the washing machine myself?
17. Drinking in front of my parents is still weird.
18. Laundry is too expensive, but late night Whataburger is always necessary.
19. The same 10 pounds I’ve been trying to lose for years are still there…just waiting around. Thanks, Whataburger.
20. I look at job postings for my dream jobs and calculate how many years of experience I still need to even apply. Then I daydream of a life where I won’t want to leave for Starbucks runs.

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sarahjfrost

Sarah ends up in at least five awkward situations a day. She's a little vain, but that's the best part of being a 20-something.

• @sarahjane1923