The only items in my fridge are condiments and beer.

I only have blood because I got away from my desk for an hour. PGP

Work wife put in her two weeks notice to take a job across the country. I’m legitimately upset about it. PGP.

Recognizing someone’s shoes underneath the stall divider. #PGP

I catch myself saying “kids these days” way too much for a 24 year old. PGP.

My older coworkers are talking about how good the new Justin Beiber album is. PGP.

Being too tired to have sex. PGP. Doing it anyway because you stayed the night and don’t want her to think you’ve transitioned into legitimately dating. PGP.