Googling “functioning alcoholic” to see if I fit the description. PGP.

Role playing sales calls with my boss is the the most terrifying thing I have done in years. PGP.

The girl I’m dating just graduated from college and can’t fall asleep before 1am. PGP.

Getting yelled at by your boss because you have been making the intern water the fake plants for the last three months. PGP.

Leaving my job in a week. All this time, I didn’t realize it was possible to do so little work and get away with it. PGP.

Having your phone charger at your desk, but not at your apartment. PGP.

There have already been several emails warning us about the consequences of taking a long lunch break for the Germany-United States game. PGP.

The first word out of my mouth every day is “fuuuuuuck.” PGP.