“Where are we at on this?” PGP.

That moment when you realize your parents were right. About everything. PGP.

I am at the biological peak of my life and spend it at a desk

Knowing that any PTO requests should be made approximately 15mins after your boss has his mid-morning snack. PGP.

I haven’t left a happy hour actually feeling happy in days.

Someone just microwaved a seafood pot pie in the office break room. PGP

My boss just called me his “technology guy” because I knew how to insert a picture into powerpoint.

Taking a shit in another mans stench. PGP

Taking fake poops

Having an emergency excel sheet ready to pull up so that you look busy, just in case someone walks by. PGP.