“I just wanna lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” -Kevin Malone. PGP.

I had to stop and take a breather during a hookup this weekend. PGP.

90% of the emails I send start with “Sorry for the delay.” PGP.

Not knowing where you stand. With anyone. PGP.

Pretty sure the homeless man selling newspapers outside my building works harder than I do on a daily basis. PGP.

Out-girthing an entire wardrobe. PGP.

Swishing black coffee in your mouth like it’s some sort of caffeinated mouthwash. PGP.