It’s not that I’m antisocial, it’s just that I don’t give a fuck anymore. PGP.

I’m too new at this to be this tired of it already. PGP.

Got to work early today so I sat in my car until I was late. PGP.

Trying to decide what the difference is between “car accident that justifies a few days off work” and “horrible car accident.” PGP.

First thing I do at work in the morning is countdown the hours until lunch. PGP.

“Afternoon Delight” now refers to a post-lunch BM. PGP.

My boss wanted to see an Excel video on YouTube, and I instinctively typed YouJizz. PGP.

It’s not a question of whether or not I’ll have drinks after work, it’s how many. PGP.

Drove half way to work until I realized it was Sunday.

My Pandora has played nothing but songs about quitting your job to move to the beach. PGP.