I’ve been faking it for over a year now, when do I start to make it?

All your best tweets going to your drafts to die cuz you’re paranoid the offensive content will get you fired

Saying, “I’ve never seen the market do anything like this before!” so it sounds like you’ve followed the market for longer than your 10 months of employment. #PGP

Looking for a girlfriend with an in-unit washer and dryer

Packing a lunch and then eating it alone in your car. PGP