XBox recognizes my achievements more than my company. PGP

You know that old cliche to keep your eye on the ball? I keep my eye on the clock.

I put in maybe 3 hours of real work everyday. During my 3 month review, my manager described me as “professional, attentive, and a quick worker.” PGPM?

The daily struggle between drinking or losing weight

Accidentally referred to myself as an alcoholic instead of a workaholic in a phone interview. At least I told the truth. PGP.

The guy in the stall next to mine said “Bless you” when I sneezed. PGP.

Anytime a co-worker asks me what I’ve been up to at work, the go to response is: “Just been putting out some fires”

Putting your office goggles on can easily turn that 5 down the hall into a solid 8. I’ve got to get out more. PGP

I wish it was acceptable to reply “Fuck it” to half of the work emails I receive. PGP.