I don’t get cranky before I’ve had my coffee, but I tell people I do so they won’t talk to me. PGP.

Explaining memes to the office dinosaur…

When your boss suggests buying or doing things that he certainly knows aren’t affordable on your salary. PGP.

I either have to propose to her or break up with her. PGP

Accountants are the Hufflepuffs of corporate America. PGP

Rage Against the Copy Machine. PGP.

Restarting the computer for a five minute break. PGP.

“Why don’t these numbers match?”

I don’t care about your kids.