My boss sent me pictures from his colonoscopy saying “See, told you I wasn’t full of shit” Massive PGP.

No idea what happened to FIFA, but I’ve had three separate conversations about it.

The next time my coworkers see me I will be sunburnt and hungover. PGP.

I’m not even pretending to work today. PGP.

Fell asleep half way through Letterman last night. PGP

I can’t get LTE in the bathroom anymore. PGP

I need coffee to poop in the morning now PGP

Skipping leg day. PGP.

I know exactly how much I can drink on a weeknight and not be hungover at work the next day. I usually blow right past it around 9 p.m. PGP.