I had a long argument with my girlfriend over a spam email from eHarmony last night. PGP.

Today, I watched in horror as the violent flush of the handicapped stall shot a pellet-sized turd directly at me. It hit my crotch and then bounced into my shoe. PGP.

Just watched my boss get swindled by a smoking hot sales rep. PGP.

Today is our last “Summer Friday” of the year. My company is making up when seasons begin and end. PGP.

It’s “Budget your time between MLB day games and fantasy football roster management” season. PGP.