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If you want to make America great again and piss off the “cuckservatives” and other “cucks” and beat Crooked Hillary by worshipping her longtime friend and donor and his tiny hands, there is a site where you can find like-minded individuals. This wonderful dating site, the best site on the internet with the most beautiful background, is TrumpSingles.com. TrumpSingles.com popped up on my Twatter timeline and I couldn’t not talk about it because when it comes to Trumpers, who else would have them other than other Trumpers?
The site obviously isn’t for the people who are so disgusted by the idea of a Hillary presidency that they are holding their nose and voting Trump or the ones who think he has some good ideas. It’s for the real, hardcore Trump cultists who blindly follow whatever he says. They want to build the wall and ban Muslims and stop being politically correct and lower/raise taxes and ban/legalize abortion and have private/government healthcare and have tariffs/not actually have tariffs and any other number of flip flops on issues. It truly is a Trumpsexual dating site.
TrumpSingles.com is going to be quite unique, in my belief. I’m sure many of the guys on there assure the women that their small hands don’t mean anything else is small and they don’t want to date anyone with Carly Fiorina’s face. Lying and cheating will be no problem since Trumpers willingly have on blinders when it comes to painful truths anyways. No education? No problem. I’ve never heard of a Trump supporter who actually knows how the federal government and Constitution work (pretty much on par with most politicians), so they can write angry letters to their GOP congressmen who don’t have enough seats in Congress to override vetoes.
Common dates will be building a symbolic wall around Hispanic neighborhoods, harassing judges in Trump civil cases, beating up protesters, tag team trolling fellow Republicans on social media then telling them to vote Trump, and calling random people “cucks.” They may even split a taco-shell-walled burrito bowl at Trump Tower and try to make Mexico pay for it. I expect a few engagements at the GOP national convention, where they will still riot even though Trump will be the nominee. The true meaning of romance.
TrumpSingles.com has a major competition problem because it’s competing with ChristianMingle.com and FarmersOnly.com, but at least until November it will be running hot. Based on my last date, who turned out to be a Trump supporter, I will be avoiding these people like the plague, but for those of you who do enjoy a good laugh I recommend checking out the photo section. It’s exactly what you’d expect. Exactly. .
Image via Rena Schild / Shutterstock.com
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@5OClockShadow_
We could’ve had Kasich/Rubio, but the GOP base decided to go batshit insane. Now we’re stuck choosing between a Lucifer in a pantsuit and an orange racist. Thanks, voters.
A Kasich Rubio ticket was my first choice as well.
“Lucifer in a pantsuit” & “an orange racist” is the most accurate comparison of Clinton & Trump of heard thus far. Props to you.
Kasich was/is the man. Trump’s best move would be to name him VP candidate ASAP. Hell, I know super liberal Dems who were going to vote Kasich over Hillary/Bernie because they liked him. But the GOP rode the Trump wave.
Yeah. Sadly for Kasich, this was the wrong year to be talking about balancing the budget and focusing on different policy achievements. Everyone knows petty insults and aggressive tweets are the path to the Oval Office now.
Found the Butthurt Bernie Bro.
If two Bernie supporters go out on a date, who pays?
Trick question. Bernie fans don’t go out to eat because restaurants don’t accept food stamps.
Taxpayers
Ding ding ding. I would’ve also accepted “The 1%.”
They’re hoping someone paid it forward from across the restaurant.
Nah, I got a Never Trump vibe from this.
Nah https://pgparchive.wpengine.com/america-needs-a-lesson-on-capitalism/
Based on this article, unless you’re voting for Gary Johnson, bashing Trump is against your own self interest. I like a lot of things Johnson says but he has no shot at winning. Plus I love how much Trump’s Great Wall of America pisses off liberals. So basically, you’re shooting yourself in the foot on this one.
I don’t know how smart it is when your vote is based on spite and not, like, you know, what’s good for the country.
I feel like Trump is a blank slate. Sure he’s said a bunch of ridiculous things but he’s never governed so we don’t actually know how he would do in that role. Hillary has her experience and it’s atrocious. Not to mention how corrupt she is and that she’d be in jail right now if she were literally anyone else. I don’t know if Trump will run this country into the ground but I do know that Hillary definitely will.
That said, I’m writing in Buster Posey on Election Day.
You’re right. But we’re a little low on options right now, if you haven’t noticed. Are you saying I should vote for Hillary? Because that’s just not going to happen.
I lean left and I still don’t fucking know. It’s a lose-lose situation at this point. It’s just going to be about who does the least amount of damage.
Fuck, you people are way too serious for a Friday.
Pushing a political agenda and then saying the people who are criticizing you are taking it too seriously is just about the most pussy thing you can do.
Making fun of Trump worshippers is pushing an agenda?
Are you really going to pretend this is a neutral piece? No one forced you to write this article. If you’re going to voice an opinion, that’s fine. But at least be a fucking man about it. You’re pathetic.
Making fun of Trump worshippers is neutral?
Living in a very liberal state, meeting a girl that is actually conservative is the biggest turn on (not saying Trump is conservative).
They could do a hillarysingles.com page.. Catchphrase- if Hillary can stand by her man, so can you!
Last time I checked it was Bernie supporters beating up people at Trump ralley’s