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“If there is any attempt for either contestant to cheat, especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty tramp, I am just gonna snap. Do I make myself clear?”
That’s pretty much what this guy had to say to his wife, her personal trainer, and all of his clients in this scathing note left on people’s windshields at a random bar in Miami.
From our reader Adam:
Found this ad on my car after leaving the bar the other night. This bro is absolutely trolling his wife who had an apparent 6 year affair with her personal trainer. These flyers were everywhere, on every car I could see. He also put up a similar Google review for Method fitness.
Here’s the note in its entirety. Ahem:
My wife [REDACTED] the WHORE in the Black Porsche Panamera, has been a client for over 6 years of [trainer’s name REDACTED], who has been providing SEXUAL and EMOTIONAL AFFAIR to my wife the WHORE. 5 days a week at 5:00am.
If you want your wife to have an affair, send her to his GYM and he will have sex with her. I am happy to get rid of this WHORE, who opened her legs to this primate.
He convinced her to LIE about the affair to her husband and continues having sex with him.
[Husband’s name REDACTED], the lucky husband who got rid of a WHORE WIFE.
If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me
305-XXX-XXXX Cellular
I love how he threw in the old “if you have any questions, feel free to contact me” line. Like, if you would like to further discuss how much of a huge tramp my wife is or my experience with being cuckolded, please don’t hesitate to reach out. It’s also pretty incredible that this personal trainer was waking up at 5 a.m., ready for sex, five days a week, on the REG. I don’t think I’ve seen what 5 a.m. looks like since my junior year of college.
As if the note wasn’t enough, he also left a scorching hot Google review on the alleged philanderer’s gym:
That’s how you take care of business. No mercy and a liberal use of the caps lock..
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Respond
Brian McGannon
What do I love? I love happy hour, a good golf tan, and getting moderately drunk during dinner.
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A married woman who drives a Porsche banging her trainer…white people, AMIRITE?
This guy gets it.
“No mercy and a liberal use of the caps lock.” Maybe that’s why I’m not successful on tinder
He should join the gym and fuck the trainer too. Really turn the tables on this WHORE.
Damn super funny,
Never getting married.
Why tell the world you couldn’t satisfy your wife and that you can’t be the bigger person?
I’ll never understand why these people do this.
Ludicrous. Absolutely ludicrous.
I know right? What happened to the good ol fashioned liquidate your spouses assets and burn her lover’s house to the ground? Fucking amateurs.
Sounds like a mission out of Grand Theft Auto.
Duel. Only solution.
His methodology is funny, but his message is written like a middle school facebook post. This is the kind of crap you’d expect a crazy girl who proudly declares “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best” to post after a breakup. Would have been much better if he’d made flyers for the gym subtly and passive-aggressively advertising their “extra” services to Lisette and other wives.
4/10